Thursday, July 29, 2010

Botanical Gardens


One of the tricks of surviving residency is knowing how to make use of days off. Last Sunday I visited Wichita's Botanica (botanical gardens). Even in the heat of summer (105 degrees some days), one can enjoy a feast of colors, shapes, fragrances, and beauty. It's refreshing to the soul.


Here are a few photos to add some sparkle to your day.



From Wichita Botanical Gardens


From Wichita Botanical Gardens


From Wichita Botanical Gardens


From Wichita Botanical Gardens

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Settling In

My first month of residency is almost over - three more ER shifts and I will be done! It has been a long month, but I think I have actually made some progress in figuring out how to be a doctor. The variety of cases and conditions I've seen is incredible. Even if two patients have the same condition, the presentation can be completely different, and thus the treatment will also be different.

For example a few nights ago I saw a middle-aged woman with acute chest pain radiating to her neck and jaw with nausea and sweating relieved by a nitroglycerin tablet under her tongue - the typical description of a heart attack. However, she had had a full cardiac work-up recently revealing no atherosclerosis or blockage of her coronary arteries. She likely has a condition called Prinzmetal angina, where there is spasming of the arteries leading to ischemia (decreased blood flow and oxygen) to the heart. A cardiac catheterization or bypass surgery won't fix her problem since it is not an issue of stopped up plumbing. Last night, a 50-year-old man came in with the same presentation. Although he had no past medical history suggesting heart disease, he did have a strong family history. After following his cardiac enzymes for a couple of hours, he did turn out to be having a heart attack. So he gets to go for a catheterization to look for and hopefully correct blocked arteries. So how do you know if someone's chest pain is caused by a heart attack? Fortunately, there is a standard set of labs and tests that get done on any patient with suspected myocardial infarction. So that takes some of the guesswork out of it.

In the past week, I have been able to do a lot of small procedures - particularly, draining abscesses and suturing lacerations. I've sewn up faces, fingers, arms, scalps, even an eyelid. I must admit that last one made me really nervous. It wasn't right over the eyeball, but pretty close. But I managed to do a pretty good job - hope it heals well without a bad scar! Generally suturing is not too bad - I'm always a little nervous about getting the wound to come together properly, but at least you can numb people up well enough that they don't feel anything. Abscesses are different. No matter how much lidocaine you use, the patient always feels some pain. They are just so tender and tense under the pressure of the abscess, and the lidocaine just doesn't penetrate into the underlying tissue well enough to make the entire operation painless. I'm still not entirely comfortable cutting people open with a scalpel. But that's not the worst part. You have to go into the abscess and break up the pockets so all the fluid can drain out. That is almost always very uncomfortable for the patient. It always makes me feel so bad to hurt them, even though I know in the long run it is for their good and will facilitate healing of the infection. Anyway, with all the practice I've had this past week, I'm beginning to at least feel more confident about my skills and more at home with a needle and scalpel in my hand.

More than anything, I love interacting with my patients. It is so gratifying to feel like I am able to help patients when they are most scared and vulnerable - reassuring them when appropriate and explaining what tests we're doing and what the results mean, educating them about how to take care of themselves when they go home, answering their questions...I think there are many patients who come to the ER just to have someone listen to their problems and "take care" of them. We have a lot of "frequent flyers" who come for every little ache and pain. Maybe some of them come because they want refills of their pain medications (narcotics). But I think some are just lonely and depressed, and perhaps their problems are more psychosocial with the pain being either a secondary issue that exacerbates or is exacerbated by their emotional issues, or a direct result of psychological problems (somatization). I admire how some of the ER docs handle these cases with compassion and patience, without doing unnecessary tests or giving out unwarranted narcotic pain medicine.

Bottom line: I have a lot to learn about doctoring - the medical part and the interpersonal part. I'm sure you will get tired of hearing that, but I think it will be a major theme for me in the next year or two. Keep praying for me and stay in touch.

Monday, July 12, 2010

Day Ten on the Job

I am now into my second full week of being a doctor, and it's beginning to feel a little more like I really belong here. The first week was really challenging - constant feelings of inadequacy, uncertainty, and overwhelming fear. For every patient I saw in the ER, I forgot parts of the history and exam, bumbled through the assessment, missed key elements of the differential diagnosis, guessed (usually wrong) what tests to run, and was completely clueless about dosing and how to write orders for medications. After three days, I was seriously struggling with doubts about my ability to ever be a good doctor.

Now, though, I think I'm beginning to turn a corner. I'm still on my emergency room rotation and still as "green" as ever - not sure how to work up and manage most of the cases I see. But I'm getting to know most of the ER doctors and what they expect. They have been very encouraging, reminding me that I am only just beginning my training, and I WILL learn with time. So, I have been trying to focus on what I can learn from each case and patient. Amazingly, I really am learning a ton. Not that I feel at all ready to take care of patients on my own, but it feels a little more comfortable.

This past weekend, I worked a couple of night shifts in the ER. Night time brings a lot of drug and alcohol related cases, as well as some trauma (accidents, injuries). One of the coolest things I got to do this week was put in a chest tube. A young guy came into the ER complaining of shortness of breath and chest pain. He didn't have any risk factors for a heart attack. He turned out to have a pneumothorax - complete collapse of one of his lungs! The chest x-ray was pretty impressive. Even I couldn't miss the diagnosis! In a pneumothorax, air collects in the pleural space between the lung and the chest wall, making it impossible to inflate the lung. To fix it, you need to get the air out, which you do by inserting a tube and connecting it to suction. I've seen chest tubes placed before, but I've never put one in myself. The ER attending allowed me to do most of the procedure. It's weird and sort of awesome to stick a scalpel into someone's chest wall, to basically cut a hole between the ribs into the inside of the chest. But now that I've done one, I can't wait to do more. I've also gotten to do a lumbar puncture (spinal tap), an arthrocentesis (where you stick a needle into someone's joint - in this case a knee - and aspirate fluid to send for analysis, then inject steroids and numbing medicine to relieve pain), incision and drainage of abscesses and suturing of lacerations. I'm not that good at these things, but I know I can learn the skills and be proficient and confident eventually.

Once again, I am reminded of God's goodness and faithfulness. He is with me and is able to provide all it takes for me to be a good doctor so I can serve him. The process may be painful at time, as I learn humility and dependence on God. So I have renewed hope and joy that I am in fact growing and learning, and it will all be worth it in the long-run.

Well, that's all for now. I am yawning and can barely keep my eyes open. Tomorrow is clinic day - instead of being in the ER, I'll be seeing patients in the office. Keep me in your prayers - for a good attitude, humility, patience and joy!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

My First Day as a Doctor

July 1 - the first day of residency for most new medical school graduates. I've been looking forward to this day with a mixture of excitement and apprehension. What if I don't have a clue what to do for a patient? What if I make a mistake? What if I miss something important?

Well, the first day has come and gone. I'm still alive, and so are my patients. I am on ER this month - emergency medicine rotation. Arriving in the ER this morning at 7:30 AM, I introduced myself as a brand new doctor. One of the attending docs showed me the ropes, explained the paperwork, answered my questions, gave me some suggestions for managing my patients and was generally very supportive, encouraging and helpful. It was an awesome day!! I may not have done everything independently or in perfect order, but I felt like I sort of new what I was doing - or at least that I could have done it on my own. I only saw five patients today, but each one was completely different, so I got to think through a variety of conditions (extreme hypertension, pancreatitis, a sprained thumb, diabetes/kidney failure, and seizures) and how to diagnose and treat them. At the end of the day, I got to call one of my colleagues, who happened to be on pediatrics, and tell her about a patient we were admitting to her team. That was pretty cool. I know some day I will look back on this post and laugh at how ridiculously naive and it is. But for now, I am loving my job! Of course, tomorrow may be different. I know I shouldn't base my contentment on the circumstances - how people treat me or how much I think I know - those are very transient and extremely changeable factors. Still, I am thankful for a good first day. Thank you Lord!

Sunday, June 27, 2010

I Love God's People!

I have been in Wichita for nearly three weeks now, and I am loving it! First of all, the prairie habitat is beautiful. But more than that, I have met some wonderful people who are making me feel right at home.

Photos of the Wichita Zoo and some of my bike rides (click on photo to link to album).
Wildlife and Scenery


I titled this post "I Love God's People" because I have been overwhelmed with the outpouring of care and friendship I have received here. Last Sunday, I went back to Heartland Community Church, a church I had visited when I interviewed for the residency program back in December. One of my pastors (Darryl, if you're reading this, thank you!) called one of Heartland's pastors a while back to check it out for me and gave his approval. So I knew it would be a good place to start when looking for a new church home. I was not disappointed. Everything from the centrality of the Word and the gospel in the worship service, to the emphasis on prayer, Bible study, accountability, fellowship and the seriousness of the sacraments reminds me of Sovereign Grace. Even the songs are similar. My prayer as I visited was that I would be able to connect to some godly sisters quickly and in a meaningful way.

Again - I was not disappointed. Several women noticed I was new and introduced themselves to me. On Monday I got an email from a gal I hadn't even met at church but who happened to hear that I was from Houston. Since she and her family had lived in Houston for a while, she felt moved to invite me over for dinner. So I enjoyed a wonderful home-cooked meal, some good ole Texas hospitality, and the start of a warm friendship. I got to know Daphne, her two teenage daughters, and their pets. After dinner, I was entertained watching Bandit (the dog) chase a laser pointer around the yard while the cats (Abby and Tabby) meowed at the window to come out and play. We also spent some time in prayer, and that meant more to me than words can express. Daphne has emailed me every day, took me to the county farmers market on Saturday, and introduced me to lots of new folks on Sunday at church.

And that's not all. There is a group of college and young working singles from Heartland and other churches that meets weekly for bible study. I met several of them last week at church, and they organized a game night at the park so we (one of my fellow residents and I) could get to know a few people. That was lots of fun. I've also had coffee with another lady from church. And on Thursday, I attended a dinner and prayer meeting for the women family medicine residents. So despite being new in town and not knowing anyone three weeks ago, my social calendar this past week looked like this:

Sunday - church
Monday - received email from Daphne, got hair done
Tuesday - chat/walk with third-year resident and her new baby, games at park with singles from church
Wednesday - dinner with Daphne and family
Thursday - prayer/dinner with women residents
Friday - coffee with another lady from church, dinner with first-year residents
Saturday - farmers market, pool party at faculty's house to welcome incoming residents
Sunday - church, dinner with my second-year resident "big sister"

Not bad, huh?

As I prepare to start orientation and work this week, I am feeling both nervous and peaceful. God has once again demonstrated his faithful loving care by surrounding me with encouraging Christian brothers and sisters both in the local church body and in my residency program. There is no doubt in my mind that this is where I am supposed to be and this is what I am supposed to be doing. Thank you Lord!

Please continue to keep me in your prayers. My first day as a "real" doctor is Thursday, July 1!

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Off to See the Wizard!

Well, I am now officially a Kansas resident - got my driver's license and my Kansas "tags" (license plate). And I'm pretty much all settled in to my new apartment in Wichita (not Kansas City).

I left Houston June 7th driving a 17-foot U-Haul truck towing my car on a trailer behind me. I definitely have more respect for truck and bus drivers now, realizing how hard it is to pick up speed, slow down, make turns and change lanes with so much stuff behind you. Fortunately, my parents went with me. Mom sat with me in the truck cab, and Dad followed in his car so he could help me change lanes and make sure I didn't lose anything out the back. By God's grace, we arrived with no mishaps!

A crew of family medicine residents was there to help us unload everything and carry it up to my second floor apartment. They were so nice - they even brought cold drinks, watermelon and cookies! For the following five days, my parents helped me get settled in and organized. We made multiple trips to Home Depot, Bed Bath and Beyond and Target to get odds and ends. They were a huge help! In fact, I am so grateful and blessed by all the friends who helped me move on both ends. God has been very good to me!


Click on the photo below to see album of my new apartment.
My New Home

My parents left on Saturday, June 12th, and of course, I cried. It made everything seem so final. But thanks to good friends - old and new - I made it through that emotional crisis. That evening, I went for a long bike ride with a couple of the upper level residents. Wichita has miles and miles of bike paths. We rode along the Big Arkansas River for a good eight or nine miles up and then turned around and rode back. It's a beautiful path, and at 7 PM it was cool, breezy and very pleasant for riding. Anyway, it was a fun way to forge new friendships and forget my homesickness for a while. Since then, I've explored some of the bike trails near my apartment and had a great time. Wichita is actually quite pretty. The terrain is flat (just what I like for biking and running!), with grasslands and woodsy areas, lots of wind to keep things cool (not so great for biking against), and creeks, ponds and rivers all over.

This past week, I finally met most of my soon-to-be classmates. We all took a pediatric advanced life support training course for two days. It is a really nice group, and I am going to enjoy working with them and getting to know them. After we passed the class on Thursday (thank you Lord!), we went out for dinner and played cards (learned a new game Trump Ten that was quite fun). Most of the folks I met are Christians, so I know they will be a good source of support and encouragement.

Now I need to find a church. I visited a Baptist church last Sunday. The service was great - very Gospel centered with good teaching from the Word. But the welcome and hospitality I am used to was distinctly lacking. I guess I'm spoiled by my 12 years at Sovereign Grace Pearland where you can't walk in the door without being greeted warmly. Well, on to other options this week. Please pray for me to find a church where I can grow and belong.

So I have next week off to explore Wichita. Orientation starts June 28th and work starts July 1. My first rotation is emergency medicine. It's actually a pretty cushy rotation. I set my own schedule, just have to complete 200 hours during the month. And I don't have any call. In a way it's good, but that only means postponing the inevitable first call night. But hopefully I'll learn some good basic stuff that will help me in my other rotations, as well as getting a chance to run codes and other stressful scenarios.

I miss all my Houston friends and family. The Ferry hostel should be up and running soon. I'm still waiting on guest beds (it's a long story), but should have all in place next week. So make your reservations soon!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Doctora Pamela

My 12th annual Bolivia medical mission trip was special in a couple of ways. First, this was the first trip in which I could actually be called “Doctora” and have it be practically true (though I don’t officially receive my MD degree until next week). Most of the week I worked with Doctor Doug, a psychiatrist, seeing children and adults with a variety of complaints – from headaches to stomach aches to leg cramps – most of them related to depression and anxiety. We prescribed medications for some, counseling for others and deep breathing exercises for all. More importantly, I had the opportunity to pray for several of these patients, which is a distinct privilege and probably one of the most healing things I know how to do.

Click on the photo below to link to my album.
Bolivia 2010

One mother brought her 9-year-old son with brain damage from birth to see if we could help him. He could not walk or talk and was confined to a wheelchair and dependent on his mother for all of his daily needs. Unfortunately, there wasn't a lot we could do for his brain. However, in the course of the visit, it became clear that mom was severely depressed. As you can imagine, having a disabled child is very difficult, but compound that with being poor, alone (her husband worked out of town), and in a town where there are no social services available for special needs children. Often, disabled children are ostracized, and mothers are blamed for doing something to cause the child's problems. Families spend all their money going from one doctor to another in the hopes of a cure, buying endless quantities of expensive "medicines" and "tonics" that they are told will improve their child's brain development. Upon investigation, we found that most of these tonics are simply vitamins that can be obtained in a normal diet. While they may have some role in neuronal function, they certainly are not able to reverse the damage done from oxygen deprivation or swelling of the brain at birth. So this poor mother, after nine years of caring for her son alone, was suffering from guilt, loneliness, hopelessness, poverty and desperation. Through the generous donations of our group sponsors, we were able to offer her a chance to send her son to a special education program in town. At the very least, it will give her a couple of days of respite during the week. We will also be able to help her see a counselor to get some support and have someone to talk with about her daily struggles. I ended the session with a prayer and encouraged her to find a church where she could pray with others and nourish her spirit.

The last day of the week, we went out to a small, rural indigenous community. Half of our group had spent the week there building a brick house for one of the families. Little by little, our partners in Bolivia, with the help of groups like ours, are providing improved houses for these Guarani villagers in order to keep out the vinchuca, a beetle that lives in cracks and crevices of wood and thatch houses and causes the dreadful disease, Chagas. For half a day on Friday, the medical team saw patients in the community health post. To make things go faster, I got to see patients by myself and managed to see 16 patients in 4 hours, which is pretty good for a recent medical school graduate! Of course, I had to ask lots of questions. For example, I had no idea what to do for the 65-year-old grandmother who came in with a blood pressure of 220/80. She was completely asymptomatic - no chest pain, no blurred vision, sharp as a whistle and no complaints at all. She did have a large heart and a heart murmur, possibly from Chagas disease, but she had never seen a cardiologist. She'd had a prescription for blood pressure medication but had not filled it, either because she didn't want to go to town to get the medicine, or because she couldn't afford it (or both). We didn't have any blood pressure meds with us, and I wouldn't have felt comfortable prescribing it for her without adequate monitoring of her pressure and symptoms over the next days and weeks. All I could do was urge her to go see a heart doctor and follow their recommendations. However, I doubt she'll go. She was perfectly comfortable and likely prefers to remain at home with her family rather than spend lots of money on doctors, tests, and medicines that might prolong her days but can't promise an improvement in the quality of her life. It was a humbling experience for me and a good reminder that doctors can't always do something for every patient.

Click on the photo below to link to my album.
Yapacani Bolivia 2010


After the medical part of the trip was over, I went out to Yapacani (where I lived several years ago) to see my friend Yolanda and her family. Yolanda was my first friend in Yapacani. She adopted me when she was 8 years old. In other words, she followed me home from the town square one day and asked me to be her godmother. I wasn't quite ready to take that on at the time, but over the years I grew close to her and her five sisters - Veronica, Maribel, Karen, Rosandra and Daniela. I have seen them all grow up and done what I could to help their mother, Rosa. Veronica is now a teacher in Santa Cruz (the nearest big city) and has three children. Maribel has a small store in Yapacani and has one little girl. Karen is studying law and wants to be a forensic specialist (like CSI). The two youngest, Daniela and Rosandra, are still in high school. Yolanda spent two years in Houston living with me and studying English, so we have a special relationship. I try to call her every month or so, and we keep in touch by email and Facebook. She now has 4 children - Jeffrey, age 5; Pamela, age 4 (named after yours truly I think); Stacey, age 2; and Matthias, age 3 months. They are all happy, healthy and cute, and I loved spending time with them as their "Tia Pamela". While I was in Yapacani, the youngest three were baptized, and I was the “madrina” (godmother). Although I do not necessarily agree with the Catholic church's view of baptism, I will still take my responsibility as godmother seriously and do my best to influence my godchildren to know and love Jesus.

Over the course of the weekend, Yolanda and I made several of her favorite recipes - meatloaf, apple crisp, brownies, lasagna, banana bread and pancakes with maple syrup! I brought a lot of ingredients with me from the US, and it was fun shopping for the rest in the Yapacani market. From past experience, I know that you should not buy already ground beef in the market - no, you can't find those nice plastic-wrapped packages of ground beef in Yapacani. Picture big slabs of meet hanging from hooks in the fresh air with flies buzzing all around. Several years ago, when my parents were visiting me in Bolivia, we bought ground meat to make spaghetti. After getting it in the pan, my dad commented that the meat was moving. Ha-ha! Good joke, Dad. But he wasn't joking. Turns out, ground meat is probably made from the meat that hasn't been sold after sitting out all day (or several days?) and is bound to contain extra protein (use your imaginations). But Yolanda, having lived in Yapacani all her life, is an expert at buying meat. She deftly selected the best pieces of hanging cow carcass and had the butcher grind it on the spot. And I didn't see anything moving in it at all. Now, making lasagna, which calls for three different cheeses, was a bit of a challenge. There is basically one type of cheese available in Yapacani, so that is what we used. Nevertheless, it came out very tasty, if I do say so myself. Yolanda's mom and sisters seemed to love it, but her children were less impressed. Jeffrey's comment was, "Wak-a-la" - yucky! (I don't think he tried anything I made, actually.)

Overall, it was a fantastic week. The group of volunteers was wonderful - hard-working, creative, and lots of fun. We had a party for the 112 girls in the Sacred Heart orphanage - they danced and sang, and we provided cake and ice cream, a real treat for them. Our group also, through donations, was able to buy all new dishes (plates, spoons, bowls, cups...) for the orphanage, as well as toys, school supplies, arts and crafts items and toothbrushes. The girls are always extremely affectionate and love to spend time with anyone who visits - grabbing your hand to show you their room, their garden, their bed - and hugging and being hugged as much as possible. I wish I could adopt all of them! Some of the older girls from the orphanage who have graduated from high school have a separate house where they live while attending university. The Laura Vicuna house (named after some Catholic missionary lady, I think), was started several years ago and now hosts 22 young ladies studying nursing, law, business administration, and many other subjects. Our group, through my dad's church (Palmer Episcopal), is providing support for the operating budget of the house (food, rent, electricity, etc.) so that the girls can focus on their studies and not have to work. On the weekends they help out at the orphanage with cooking, cleaning and caring for the 112 younger girls. According to the orphanage director, more and more girls are thinking about higher education because of the example of the Laura Vicuna group. Before, many of the girls would leave the orphanage at age 14 or 15 to work (mainly as domestic help) and usually end up pregnant and poor. Now, they see that they have an option and that there is support for them if they choose to pursue a career in teaching, nursing, medicine, law or other careers. We feel very privileged to be a part of such a wonderful and successful endeavor. The orphanage staff and volunteers do all the work, of course, and they do an amazing job of loving and raising all the girls.

Overall, it was a wonderful trip, filled with friendship, service, beautiful scenery and wildlife (we spent a day at an eco-reserve in Santa Cruz with a bird and butterfly sanctuary). I don't know if I will be able to fit in a trip next summer with my residency schedule, but I hope so. It is always a pleasure to share the Bolivia experience with others and to reconnect with the place that has been such an important part of my life.